Sunday, February 04, 2007

Exhausted

It's been a busy, exhausting, heartbreaking week. My eldest son, whom I just got back home in August (he'd been in a specialized foster home for 8 years due to severe behavioral issues) ran away from home AGAIN this past week. He's still under protective supervision of the county since he does have severe issues---and they had to take custody back because he just wasn't doing anything he was supposed to be doing. A week ago, he and I had been talking and he told me that his friend said to him that he was so lucky to have the life and the family that he has and he was so lucky to have a mother that loved him and took good care of him. He told me that his friend was right. Two days later, he was on a downward spiral that ended up destroying his life as he knew it. As we knew it. So, he is now gone and I am heartbroken and sad. I was so hopeful about him being home.

The worst thing about it is that everyone said this would happen, that he wouldn't be able to live at home and do things right. I'm glad we at least tried---as heartbreaking as it is to have to lose him again---at least I know that I tried my hardest to give him the love and family he craved, even if he didn't seem to want it when he was here.

Needless to say, I haven't had the time or the energy to work on any projects. Some good news, we finally met with the mortgage broker and he said he is definitely going to be able to get us into a house, most likely the one we want. I am hoping we hear good news from him soon, we can use some wonderful, happy news.

3 comments:

swooze aka Suzette said...

I hope your son finds some answers for himself. My nephew needs some of those answers himself. Know that I am thinking of you and understand the heartache.

Rian said...

I hope you get some good news soon. It is heartbreaking to know your son is out there fending for himself. Hugs and prayers.

Marsaili said...

Thanks Suzette and Rian, it is heartbreaking but he is getting the help he needs now, and I am grateful for that!